Most Sexy Actress

Abigail Clancy Because She Is Hot Part 1000

2009-09-30T10:48:00.002-07:00

It’s been a while since I’ve seen British babe Abigail Clancy and her sweet little body, here she is at some charity event fashion show for Claire House Hospice held at St. Georges Hall as part of Liverpool’s Fashion Week I think. When did Liverpool get a fashion week, that’s retarded, Liverpool having a fashion week is like a group of homeless people having a wine festival.

Adriana Lima’s Boobs Keep Getting Bigger

2009-09-30T10:48:00.001-07:00

Here’s Adriana Lima looking like a modern day Cleopatra at the launch of Victoria’s Secret ‘Noir Fragrance and Body Care Collection’. Lately, each and every time I see Adriana, her breasts keep getting bigger and bigger. Guess what? I can’t wait till next year!

8 more pictures of Adriana Lima here

Adrianne Curry Topless

2009-09-30T10:47:00.002-07:00

Adrianne Curry is the only hot piece of ass to ever come out of America’s Next Top Model. I don’t know why she never exploded on to the modeling scene like the show promised, but she did manage to make me explode with these pictures she posted of herself on her Twitter page. I think that’s better than winning some lame ass show and a bigger accomplishment. Anyway, let’s hope she and other celebs keep those Twitter photos coming because they’re much more interesting than Paparazzi shots…

Alessandra Ambrosio Is Just Too Hot

2009-09-30T10:47:00.001-07:00

Here’s supermodel Alessandra Ambrosio out the other night with her model friend Fernanda Motta celebrating Fernanda’s birthday at some club called Le 55. How come I don’t get invited to this shit, I need to hire a real publicist, mom’s just not working out the way I had hoped. Anyhow, Alessandra looked hot, blah blah blah, she’s a f@#king supermodel she always looks hot. I think I’ve been in this basement too long.

Alexis Bledel’s Got Little Cleavage

2009-09-30T10:46:00.001-07:00

Here’s Alexis Bledel arriving for The Whitney Contemporaries ART PARTY in New York City the other day showing off some boney cleavage. I guess she’s pretty cute, if you like weird looking girls who may or may not be able to read minds. Her head is bizarrely shaped, she must have some sort of super power, I’m pretty sure she knows what I’m thinking right now.

Ali Landry Is A Handy Adventure

2009-09-30T10:45:00.000-07:00

Here’s Ali Landry at the ‘Handy Manny Motorcycle Adventure‘ premiere the other night. Speaking of handy adventures, after seeing pictures of her, I’ve got one of my own going on over here. God she’s hot! Everything from her complexion to her lips to her toes are perfection. I’d be a afraid to touch her in fear of messing her up. I guess I could wear mittens.

Ali Larter Because She’s Hot And Obsessed

2009-09-30T10:44:00.001-07:00

I’ve being noticing that Ali Larter’s new movie Obsessed is being heavily promoted and I have to admit with all the TV ads, viral campaigns and so on, I’m little interested in seeing her play a sex charged psychopath. The thought of some hot chick stalking me and wanting to kill me if I don’t bang the living daylights out her is a major turn on. I don’t see how this film is really a thriller considering to most men cheating on your wife or girlfriend with a crazy “Perfect 10” is not really cheating. It’s a chance of a lifetime!

Alyssa Milano Wants You To Touch

2009-09-30T10:43:00.000-07:00

Here’s Alyssa Milano promoting the Touch Collection at the NBA store in New York the other day. I know that most of you are expecting me to make some sort of demeaning comment about how much I’d like to touch Alyssa’s boobs or how I wish she’d touch my no-no spot but I’m not going to do that today… I’d like to bang the sh$t out of her.

17 more pictures of Alyssa Milano here

Amanda Bynes And Her Little Gifts

2009-09-30T10:42:00.000-07:00

I find Amanda Bynes decent looking, she’s no Hilary Duff or Blake Lively, but she’s very popular with my readers and she gets the most email request so here she is. Sadly, most of the emails are from older retards asking me out on dates because they seem to think that because I have pictures of Amanda Bynes on the site it must mean that I am Amanda Bynes. Am I the only one who reads these posts? Anyhow, this one’s for you guys. PS. If you’re thinking of sending me a gift, I’m a size ten mens shoe, I need a new Taylormade driver and the new NHL 2K10 for Xbox360. Love Amanda.

Amy Smart Topless With Her Nipples Covered

2009-09-30T10:41:00.002-07:00

Here’s Amy Smart on set of her movie Crank 2. I’m not quite sure why they’re covering up her nipples with tape since we’ve seen her topless many times before but it’s kind of hot. Hopefully that’s how she’ll be for most of the movie but right at the end she’ll remove the tape and fireworks will go off in the background with THE END written across the screen.

Angelina Jolie’s Boring Hotness

2009-09-30T10:41:00.001-07:00

I don’t have much to say about these pictures of Angelina Jolie attending the ‘Inglourious Basterds’ premiere at the Cannes Film Festival the other day. She’s not doing anything outrageous or flashing her fancy lady Junk, just Angelina in her evening gown showing off her long legs and cheesy prison tattoos. Boring! If you look real close you can see a little nipple and her granny panties through her dress. It’s better than nothing.

21 more pictures of Angelina Jolie here

Anna Faris Bikini Pictures

2009-09-30T10:40:00.001-07:00

I always wondered about the authenticity of Anna Faris’s breasts, but I think it’s safe to say that she has a pair of fugazis. I’m not 100% sure, but judging by the way they hold up in that bikini they look damn fake. Here she is at the beach in Hawaii with some dude that’s not you. Suckas! Wait I’m not with her either…

more pictures of Anna Faris here

Anna Kournikova’s Got Sweet Cleavage

2009-09-30T10:39:00.000-07:00

Here’s my favorite tennis player to never win a tournament, Anna Kournikova in Paris with her latino douche doing a little shopping. How do you say douche in Spanish? I guess it doesn’t matter, my point is that Anna is flashing some sweet cleavage and long legs and that’s all we should be focussing on. I’ve always had a fetish for Russian hotties in short skirts and heels awkwardly getting in and out of sensible minivans. I’m sure I’m not the only one.

Anna Paquin Bikini Pictures Are Disappointing

2009-09-30T10:38:00.001-07:00

When I think of a young Hollywood starlet from one of the hottest shows on television frolicking in the surf, this is not what comes to mind. Here’s Anna Paquin doing a little body surfing at the beach the other day, wearing a t-shirt in the ocean like she’s a fat kid with chicken pocks. WTF? She’s pretty damn tight, she shouldn’t be hiding her body, she should be hiding those teeth. She’s scaring the sharks away.

Annalynne McCord Brings Out The Animal In Me

2009-09-30T10:37:00.000-07:00

Is it odd that I want to hump AnnaLynne McCord? Even dry humps, I’ll take what I can get. She’s f@#king hot, even if she already kinda looks like a forty year old cougar. Here she is in a tight animal print dress that brings out the hunter in me. I’d like to mount her sweet ass on the wall of my trophy room. F@#k that! I’d just like to mount her ass. You heard me right.

Anne Hathaway And Her Blinding Cleavage

2009-09-30T10:35:00.000-07:00

I’m not a big Anne Hathaway fan. She’s a little too pasty for my liking, but here she is at the screening for Rachel Getting Married and I have to admit, I’m digging her cleavage in that blue dress. It almost makes me forget that I can see my reflection in her skin. Anyway, I know she’s single now and if she needs help applying some tanning cream on them beauties, she should feel free to drop me an email.

Mariah Carey Hides Her Fat In Black

2009-09-30T10:33:00.000-07:00

Here’s Mariah Carey out promoting her new fragrance ‘Forever’ at Macy’s the other day. I have to say that all the perfume in the world won’t cover up the fact that she looks like she’s put on about fifty pounds, and not in the good spots. At least she’s very clever about wearing her stealth like black outfit, I can hardly tell that her ass looks massive, she’s like a ninja. A really large ninja.

more pictures of Mariah Carey here

MILF Heather Locklear Is Looking Tight

2009-09-30T10:32:00.000-07:00

Here’s the latest MILF to attempt a comeback Heather Locklear on the set of the new Melrose Place looking pretty damn tight if you ask me. My guess is that she plays somebody’s slutty mother who ends up banging one or two of their friends and probably their fathers. Scandalous! What channel is this on and are they allowed nudity? I think it’s about time.

Rachel Stevens’ Sexy 2010 Calendar

2009-09-30T10:31:00.000-07:00

Here are a few pictures from Rachel Stevens sexy new 2010 calendar, now this is a calendar I can hang on my bathroom wall. I have to hang it in the bathroom because after looking at it I’m going to need to take a shower and probably a nap. Rachel looks pretty damn awesome in her lingerie, I think she should do it more often… At my place say around midnight, I’ll get the hot tub started.

more pictures of Rachel Stevens here

April Scott Because She Is Hot

2009-09-17T23:01:00.001-07:00

I haven’t done a post on April Scott in ages. If you don’t remember who she is, she’s the girl who took over the role of Daisy Duke in the Dukes Of Hazzards after Jessica Simpson. Unfortunately that movie went straight to DVD, and April never got the big career boost she may have wanted. On the bright side though, she’ll always have a place in my heart. It might not be the same as fame and fortune but hey, it’s gotta count for something.

Ashlee Simpson In A See Through Dress

2009-09-17T23:00:00.001-07:00

What’s this I see? Ashlee Simpson looking might tasty in a see-through cleavage revealing dress. It’s about time she ups her game, considering Jessica has been taking the sweater puppies out every chance she gets. Speaking of which, where’s Jessica been lately? It’s been two weeks since we last saw her, and that’s far too long in my books. I miss her. Sorry, Ashlee, I didn’t mean to turn this into a Jessica Simpson worship post, but unfortunately, you’ll always be sloppy seconds.

Ashley Greene’s Tasty Cleavage

2009-09-17T22:59:00.001-07:00

I have done a few posts on Twilight star Ashley Greene, but besides knowing what she looks like, I’ve never heard her speak. Yes, I think I’m the only person who hasn’t seen that movie yet. Anyway, here she is at the premiere of ‘Julie & Julia‘ showing some sweet ample cleavage and since ‘Julie & Julia’ is a movie about cooking, I’d like to take a bite out of those!

The Olsen Twins Because Ashley Is Hot… Kinda

2009-09-17T22:58:00.001-07:00

The Olsen Twins have a new book out called Influence, and they appeared at a signing at Barnes & Noble the other day. I have to admit, Ashley Olsen is looking hot in her tight leather pants and bra-exposing see-through top, but I don’t think she should be wearing that. I mean, I know she’s older than 18 but girl doesn’t look a day over 16. That said, let’s move along before I write something I’ll eventually regret.

16 more pictures of The Olsen Twins here

Ashley Tisdale Covers Up

2009-09-17T22:57:00.001-07:00

Here’s Ashley Tisdale presenting her second solo album ‘Guilty Pleasure’ at the Hotel de Las Letras in Madrid the other day. I guess her handlers have gotten her under control because this time she covered up the upskirt, which is pretty annoying considering my guilty pleasure IS upskirts and cotton candy. I wonder if there’s a way to combine the two. I’ll keep you posted.

more pictures of Ashley Tisdale here

Aubrey O’Day Is A Hippie With Fake Boobs Part 2

2009-09-17T22:55:00.000-07:00

I’m not sure why I keep posting pictures of this nobody Aubrey O’Day, it may have something to do with her nipples always falling out. In any case, the last time we saw her she was dressed as a hippie for Halloween and now here she is looking like an ACTUAL hippie. I’m disappointed, I thought hippies didn’t wear bras. She’s probably hiding a disgusting hippie bush under that smock. Sick!

13 more pictures of Aubrey O’Day here

Audrina Patridge Disappoints

2009-09-17T22:53:00.000-07:00

I’m upset with Audrina Patridge, I know she’s a nobody, but I thought she’d a least get herself a decent douche to hang out with. Here she is at some Red Bull event looking pretty damn good even with the asshole securely attached to her arm. I’d like to say she’d look even better with her legs wrapped around my head but we’re in a recession and even mustache rides aren’t free these days.

more pictures of Audrina Patridge here

Rotten Tuna: Avril Lavigne

2009-09-17T22:49:00.000-07:00

Here’s Avril Lavigne at a fashion show for her childish Wal Mart clothing line Abbey Dawn. I thought we were done with this bullshit punk princess look, running shoes and bad Xtina lipstick is not an attractive look, especially for someone in their thirties. (I have no idea how old Avril is) I’m pretty sure that nobody other than Avril herself and maybe a handful of trannies actually wear this shit.

Bar Refaeli SI Bikini Candids

2009-09-17T22:48:00.001-07:00

It has come to my attention (thanks goldenfiddlr.) that MJ_Day, chief editor at SI is twittering her recent candid shots of the 2010 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. She recently posted pictures of Bar Rafael in a bikini. Thanks whoever you are and keep them coming!

I’m Obsessed With Beyonce’s Breasts

2009-09-17T22:47:00.001-07:00

Obviously the title to this post is pretty lame but the message comes across the way I had hoped, they can’t all be award winners. Anyhow, here’s Beyonce at the Obsessed premiere the other night showing off a couple of her many talents. I’m not going to see this movie because the images in my head of Beyonce and Ali Larter catfighting are much hotter than anything a film maker could produce. I’ll give you a hint, there’s a midget and at least on stick of butter involved.

17 more pictures of Beyonce Knowles here

Blake Lively Is Boobalicious

2009-09-17T22:45:00.001-07:00

I hate to say it, but I think I need to start watching Gossip Girl, I’m a grown man so that statement sounds pretty retarded, but I think it’s the only way I’m going to get any quality time with my future ex wife Blake Lively. Here she is on the set showing off her gorgeous long legs and sweet cleavage. Come on, if they show forty-four minutes of this shit every week how could you not watch the show. Can I program my Tivo to cut out every seen that doesn’t involve Blake? I need tech support.

Britney Spears Bikini Pictures Part 3

2009-09-17T22:42:00.000-07:00

Well, we’ve got some more bikini pictures of Britney Spears but this time she’s in a purple bikini and showing more ass. I have nothing left to say since I’ve said everything I possibly could in my two previous posts. That said, here’s Britney Spears in a bikini for those of you who like crazy chicks with a little something to grab on to.

Brittany Murphy Is Rockin’

2009-09-17T22:41:00.001-07:00

It’s been a while since I’ve done a post on Brittany Murphy, but here she is at some Rock The Vote event in Sundance and she’s looking pretty damn good. I guess when the only thing going on in her career is being the voice of Luanne on King of the Hill, it’s pretty easy to stay out of them limelight. But that doesn’t mean you’ve forgotten about her, because we all know you sleep with your Luanne action figure every night. She’s the closest you’ll ever get to having a girl in your bed.

Brooke Burke In A Bikini For Ralph Magazine

2009-09-17T22:38:00.002-07:00

Brooke Burke has got to be the hottest MILF out there. I’ve never seen a girl have kids and still look like that in a bikini. I don’t know how she does it, but I can only assume that she’s got super genes. It’s kind of sad knowing that most of you guys (not me, of course) will never have the chance to marry, let alone date a girl like Brooke Burke, but hey, you can always bang one! So what if it costs 300 bucks? No one has to know.

Brooke Hogan’s Boobs Because They Make Her Feminine

2009-09-17T22:38:00.001-07:00

I don’t know why it is, but you guys seems to have a secret love affair with Brooke Hogan and her Hulkamaniac tits. Sure they’re big and fake, but so is the rest of her. I just can’t get into to her most because of her size, she might destroy me in a leg wrestling match. On a positive side, she does have great funbags and one thing is for sure, I’d step in a ring with those.

Brooklyn Decker’s Nude Bodypainting In SI

2009-09-17T22:36:00.001-07:00

I think I’ve found the 2010 SI Swimsuit Cover girl. I know we just got the 2009 issue but that’s old news already. We must look forward and I believe Brooklyn Decker has the title in her grasp. I never understood the appeal to nude bodypainting, since wearing clothes is just easier but SI seems to disagree, it’s in this year’s issue, again.

Cameron Diaz Is Looking Good

2009-09-17T22:34:00.000-07:00

Here’s Cameron Diaz showing off her tight body at the premiere of her new movie ‘My Sister’s Keeper’. I don’t have much to tell you, we all know she’s hot, I’d give my left nut to have her touch my right one. You know the drill. Jesus she’s sexy! Look at those eyes, I think I’ve been hypnotized into thinking she’s a good actress and should get her own star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

more pictures of Cameron Diaz here

Camilla Belle Because She Is Hot

2009-09-17T22:33:00.001-07:00

Here’s a fresh face to add a little something something to the beginning of our week. Camilla Belle. Yes, she is tres tres belle but she should change her last name to f%ckin hot because that’s what she really is. Anyway, here she is at MusiCares Person of the Year Tribute. Enjoy.

Carmen Electra Because She’s Top Heavy

2009-09-17T22:31:00.000-07:00

Here’s Carmen Electra hosting a party at Pangaea Nightclub as it celebrates its fourth anniversary with ‘A Night Under the Big Top’. I’d like to spend a night under Carmen Electra’s big tops. Get it? Because she’s a little top heavy, she’s got massive fake chesticles, her bikini stuffers are full, her honeydews are ripe, her snow globes are shaken up… You get the point.

Carrie Underwood Has Come Out Of Hiding

2009-09-17T22:30:00.001-07:00

The last time we saw Carrie Underwood she dropped deck like an idiot at an Ottawa Senators’ hockey game on the Jumbo-Tron. I guess she finally realized that it isn’t such a big deal that she’s banging another Pro-Athlete and her personal life isn’t worth keeping private because no one cares anyways! If she was dating some loser celebrity site webmaster, well that’s a different story. I’d keep that shit on the DL.. but since that’s never going to happen, I’ve been trying to score one for god knows how long. She might as well keep waving at the Paparazzi and whoring herself to every athlete she can get her paws on with a big smile on her face.

Cassie’s Sweet Ass In Complex Magazine

2009-09-17T22:28:00.002-07:00

For you those of you who don’t know who Cassie is, she’s the hottest R&B artist out there in my opinion. Here she is in Complex Magazine promoting her second album. And boy, is she doing a good job at it; this girl puts Rihanna and Beyonce to shame! Don’t believe me? Check out her old bikini pictures. Enough said.

Check out video of Cassie at Complex here

Charlize Theron’s Legs Are Delicious

2009-09-17T22:28:00.001-07:00

Here’s Charlize Theron at ‘The Burning Plain’ premiere in Paris the other night, I don’t know who the limp dick old man she’s holding hands with is but I don’t like it one bit. Those long gorgeous legs shouldn’t go to waste. Her dress makes her look a little like those pre-wrapped baked potatoes they sell at my local grocery store, I’d like to tear it open and cover her with some sour cream and bacon bits. Delicious.

Cheryl Tweedy Is The Gift That Keeps On Giving

2009-09-17T22:27:00.001-07:00

It’s my future ex-wife Cheryl Tweedy’s birthday weekend and of course I forgot to get her a gift again but being such a forgiving woman she’s decided to reward me by giving us a peek inside the forbidden zone that is her sweet sweet cleavage. What a gal. I’m not too pleased about the shifty eyed dude with his greasy fingers all over her but when I look into her eyes, or at least try not to stare at her boobs, I know everything will be ok.

Just In! Christina Aguilera Looks Sexy

2009-09-17T22:26:00.000-07:00

It seems to be a rare thing these days to find pictures of Christina Aguilera where she’s not looking like a sad clown but here she is at a Grammy nominations concert looking pretty good. She’s still got that hooker lipstick but other than that I like it, her dress makes her tits look like two delicious baked potatoes. A little sour cream and bacon bits and I’d be all over her.

Christina Hendricks’ Breasts Are The Tops

2009-09-17T22:23:00.000-07:00

If you were wondering who has the most amazing cleavage in Hollywood. It isn’t Salma Hayek, Jessica Simpson, or even Scarlett Johansson. Nope, it’s Christina Hendricks. I’m in love. It’s not very often I fall in love with a set of tits because I”˜m not one to settle down but there is no topping those heavenily mounds. I’m forever yours, boobs!

Christina Milian Bikini Pictures

2009-09-17T22:21:00.002-07:00

Here are new Christina Milian bikini pictures from Hawaii. Please ignore the dude she’s with because he ruins everything that is good about Christina. I tried over and over, but unfortunately the thought of him with his grubby hands all over tight little body just makes me angry and a little bitter and I’m not usually like that… that is only when a hot chick has a boyfriend.

Christina Ricci Wears Short Shorts

2009-09-17T22:21:00.001-07:00

Here’s Christina Ricci out in a pair of short shorts showing off some sweet legs and more than a little forehead. I’ve always like Christina, even with her unfortunate hairline, she’s cute and she seems like the kind of girl that will dress up as a nurse and punch you in the face during sex. Hot. There’s something about a hot girl with a fivehead that I like, It makes for a big target.

more pictures of Christina Ricci here

Cindy Crawford, I Love You

2009-09-17T22:19:00.000-07:00

The other night I was minding my own business hanging outside a hotel when a big black SUV shows up, and lo and behold Cindy Crawford gets out wearing a tight red dress. I never get star struck, but Cindy was my childhood fantasy and to see her in person just 5 feet from me left me paralyzed from the waist up. The waist down is a different story but man, the woman is hotter in person. One of the hottest specimens I’ve ever seen in my life. Anyway, we made eye contact and I think we fell in love for one quick second. However, circumstances and security guards put an end to our brief moment. So Cindy, if by chance you are reading this, I just want you to know that you made a dream of mine come true Saturday night and it’s only fitting that I repay you and make all your dreams come true as well. Call me.

Cindy Margolis’ Breasts Are Comfy

2009-09-17T22:18:00.000-07:00

Here’s the former “Most Downloaded Girl on the Internet” Cindy Margolis at some club opening in Las Vegas. Man, I’m impressed! For a girl who’s 40+, she’s got one of the nicest racks I’ve ever seen. I’m speechless. All I can think about is how the hell can I find a way to get my head between them and take a nap? They look a lot more comfortable than the current set of pillows I’m sleeping on.

Danielle Lloyd’s Got Cleavage

2009-09-17T08:06:00.000-07:00

Here’s busty British nobody Danielle Lloyd at the ‘Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen’ premiere in London the other day. I think I’m starting to figure out why she keeps getting invited to these things, she’s obviously a very talented actress and one of England’s finest and most respected citizens. Did anybody buy that? It’s clearly because of her big fat titties and the low cut dresses she wears to highlight them. Keep up the good work.

more pictures of Danielle Lloyd here

Denise Richards Bikini Pictures

2009-09-17T08:02:00.000-07:00

Staged bikini candids are lame! Here’s Denise Richards in Maui doing her best to garner attention for her future reality show that no one cares about. Anyway, I think she looks alright considering she had some kids but she shouldn’t parade herself in a bikini if she’s not going to show off her mom booty. The girl had more than enough free time to get that ass in gear.

Elisha Cuthbert And Her Little Old Lady Dress

2009-09-17T08:00:00.002-07:00

Elisha Cuthbert showed up to 24’s 150th Episode & Season 7 premiere party wearing one of the ugliest dresses of all time. This shouldn’t be a surprise though, Elisha is famous for having bad taste in clothing. Sometimes I wonder if she lets one of her hockey player boyfriends dress her. Whatever the case, Elisha should spend less time being a puck slut and more time being my slut. I’ll dress her up just right.

Eliza Dushku Nude In Allure’s “Naked Truth”

2009-09-17T08:00:00.001-07:00

Here’s Eliza Dushku posing buck naked for Allure Magazine’s “Naked Truth” photoshoot. She looks pretty hot for a change, not as hot as Padma Lakshmi but she’ll do. If they’re going to take the time to airbrush out her nipple they could have gotten rid of that shitty tattoo. It probably says something like ‘don’t be such a dushku’ or ‘your mama’s a dushku’ because her name sounds a lot like douche… You see, it’s a shitty play on words.

Elizabeth Berkley Shows Some Serious Boob Action

2009-09-17T07:58:00.000-07:00

I don’t know when these pictures were taken, but I’m guessing they’re old. However, I have to post them because Elizabeth Berkley changed my life. Yes, her lap dance scene in Showgirls was not only enough to make the guy in the film make a mess in his pants, it made me make one in my pants too. And I was only watching it! Hey, I was only like 15 years old, and porn wasn’t easy to get. Anyway, here she is at some event showing off some serious boob action, and if you’ve never seen the movie Showgirls, I suggest you rent it. The Academy may have overlooked it, but it won an Oscar in my mind. It’s an all-time classic.

Elizabeth Hurley Is Still The Queen Of Cleavage

2009-09-17T07:57:00.000-07:00

Has Elizabeth Hurley recently had a few babies that I don’t know about? I know that can’t be right, she’s way too old for that, but her breasts look like Salma Hayek’s massive new mom tits. Here she is at the Global Illumination Initiative at the London Tower proving once again that she’s the queen of cleavage. Personally I think those pillows need stuffing.

Elle Macpherson’s Got Nipple-itis

2009-09-17T07:55:00.000-07:00

Here’s Elle Macpherson dropping her kids off at school on a chilly day making all the other moms feel absolutely terrible about themselves and giving the single dads awkward feelings in their pants. She still looks f@#king good. This is one of the major reasons I want to have children, so that maybe, just maybe one day when I’m dropping them off at school I’ll run into a mom who looks like this. Everyone’s got to have a dream.

Emily Scott Is Wanted

2009-09-17T07:54:00.000-07:00

I don’t normally post only two pics for a post, but when the subject is Emily Scott in the latest Ralph’s Magazines “Most Wanted” issue, I couldn’t help myself, nor deny you the opportunity to be weakened by looking into her Kryptonite-like green eyes. That’s if you can get pass those chesticles. Anyway, don’t look too long her gaze could be deadly.

Emma Roberts Bikini Pictures

2009-09-17T07:53:00.000-07:00

Here’s Emma Roberts on the set of her new movie ‘Valentine’s Day’ dancing in her bikini top and ripped jeans. Am I allowed to find this hot, how old is this chick? I better look away just to be safe. I think that if I got a teenager to write this post it would be alright but it would probably go something like “Dude here’s the daughter of that old guy from The Wrestler (because they have no idea who Eric Roberts is) looking buzzing in her yellow bikini top, I’m going to add her on Facebook so I can send her a picture of my junk, cul8r”.

Emma Watson See Through Pictures

2009-09-17T07:48:00.000-07:00

I don’t see anything at all attractive about Emma Watson, but she manages to get on the site occasionally by flashing her lady junk. Now maybe if she brushed her hair, got a tan and some fake tits she could be “hot”, but I guess this how the geeks that watch Harry Potter like her. That said, here she is in a fake see through/mesh top for all her fans to put on their Harry Potter glasses and see if they can find a nipple.

more pictures of Emma Watson here

Emmanuelle Chriqui’s Sweet Cleavage

2009-09-17T07:47:00.000-07:00

Here’s Emannuelle Chriqui showing off some delicious Canadian cleavage at the Entourage Season 6 premiere the other night. If you don’t watch the show because you don’t want to feel bad about your boring life I can understand that, but Emmanuelle is a good reason to start, this girl is hot and should be featured on more television shows. Maybe an hour on Dateline or 60 Minutes, something that highlights her special lady talents, preferably in various bikinis or some lingerie. I’ll set my Tivo.

more pictures of Emmanuelle Chriqui here

Emmy Rossum’s Sexy In Details Magazine

2009-09-17T07:46:00.000-07:00

I don’t have a clue what Emmy Rossum has been in nor do I care, but she’s pretty damn sexy in the latest issue of Details Magazine. From the looks of it she plays the trumpet, I wonder if she could play my trumpet too?!

Eva Longoria’s Bra Save Us From A See Through Moment

2009-09-17T07:45:00.000-07:00

Eva Longoria went out for dinner last night at Beso and the Paparazzi and their x-ray lenses managed to penetrate through her black top. Fortunately for Eva and for us, she had a special x-ray proof bra on. Yes, I have no desire to see Eva’s itty-bitties, ever. Anyway, she also managed to put on a heavy dose of concealer and makeup because she’s not as ugly as usual.

14 more pictures of Eva Longoria here

Eva Mendes Is Perky Goodness

2009-09-17T07:43:00.000-07:00

Apparently GQ Magazine had their annual Men Of The Year Awards last night and all the hotties, who don’t have a movie good enough to make it to any of the European film festivals that are going on right now, showed up in their sexy little evening gowns. Here’s Eva Mendes in a sweet somewhat see through dress showing off her talents. I can’t tell for sure if it’s see through, if I was actually there I may have been able to get a better look but my invitation seems to have gotten lost in the mail again. Odd, especially considering the company that delivered my mail order bride didn’t have any trouble finding the place.

more pictures of Eva Mendes here

Evangeline Lilly’s Little Arms Are A Big Problem

2009-09-17T07:41:00.001-07:00

Evangeline Lilly looks like she’s having a tough time with that surf board. At first, I thought it was because her board must be at least 3 feet wide, making it almost impossible for her to get her arm around the thing. Then I realized the board wasn’t the problem. It’s her freakishly short little arms! I can’t believe I never noticed this before! I suggest she uses her boyfriend’s board from now on. It’s Hobbit sized, just like her arms.

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Evangeline Lilly Bikini Pictures

Fergie’s Face Of Death

2009-09-17T07:39:00.000-07:00

I’m pretty sure all my comments about Fergie looking like an old lady are finally starting to get to her because I think she’s hitting the botox, here she is at some March of Dimes event looking like she’s just been embalmed. Seriously, look at her face, it doesn’t change from one picture to the next, she looks like a corpse. She’s creeping me out. This is what I picture when I think about looking in to the face of death. I’d still hit it.

Gemma Atkinson’s Not So Pint Sized Cans Drining Pints

2009-09-17T07:38:00.001-07:00

Here’s everyone’s favorite average-looking girl Gemma Atkinson showing off her very non-average sized funbags at some pub in Ireland. I think this is the third time we’ve seen Gemma wear that top, but that information is extremely useless, and I shouldn’t have brought it up because no girls read my site. That said, check out the size of those!

Geri Halliwell Gets Her Ass Grabbed By A Dirty Old Man

2009-09-17T07:37:00.001-07:00

This just seems to make sense to me, a former pop sensation washed up and over the hill in a bikini getting her ass grabbed by some dirty old man on a yacht in the Mediterranean. It’s the circle of life. Spice lady Geri Halliwell must have known this day would come, she’s getting up there in years and her boobs are slowly making a break south so it was just a matter of time before she’d have to be hanging out with old perverts to make ends meet. I have to give the old guy credit for restraining himself, if a spice girl’s ass was that close to my head I’m not sure I’d be able to keep myself from taking a bite.

63 more pictures of Geri Halliwell here

Gisele Bundchen’s Got Something To Sell

2009-09-17T07:34:00.000-07:00

Here’s supermodel Gisele Bundchen promoting new Ipanema Sandals, but you wouldn’t know this by looking at the pictures. If anything she’s promoting her tits because they’re almost falling out of her dress. I’ll take two pair, thanks!

Gwen Stefani’s Legs Are Thick And Delicious

2009-09-17T07:32:00.000-07:00

I always thought that Gwen Stefani had pretty hot legs but here she is getting out of her SUV with massive thunder thighs, she could crush coconuts with those things. I think they just look thick because I’m comparing them the pictures I posted earlier of Lindsay Lohan’s freshly dumped skinny legs. At least I hope so because she looks like she could probably tow a Gypsy caravan across the countryside.

Bad News!!! Heather Locklear Has Aged

2009-09-17T07:30:00.001-07:00

It’s a sad day here at Hollywood Tuna after witnessing these new Heather Locklear beach photos. Age is slowly catching up to Heather, and it’s really too bad. You see, I’ve always had a crush on her, and was hoping she’d never grow old. Unfortunately, none of us can fight the inevitable, not even Heather Locklear. It was a valiant effort though. She almost pulled it off.

Halle Berry’s Rare Underboob Sighting

2009-09-17T07:28:00.000-07:00

The NAACP Awards were last night, I didn’t watch them because I was shampooing the rugs but I’ve got some nice pictures of Halle Berry’s underboob if it makes you feel any better. Underboob is a rare and beautiful site, it’s very hard to find out in the wild, like unicorns and blond asian chicks.

11 more pictures of Halle Berry here

Hayden Panettiere Is A Little Cheerleader

2009-09-17T07:26:00.002-07:00

I don’t know if these pictures of Hayden Panettiere in her hot little cheerleader outfit were taken on the set of ‘Heroes’ or not but I certainly hope so because that show has pretty much jumped the shark in my books. It’s absolute garbage! Getting Hayden back as a cheerleader might actually bring back a viewer or two because perverts love cheerleaders. Personally I’ve had enough of this all American good girl image she’s got going on, it’s time for a slutty/lesbian/little person movie roll. Something that will slow us bloggers down because we’ll be typing with one hand. Talk to your agent and get back to me.

Heather Graham’s Nipples Aren’t The Only Thing That’s Erect

2009-09-17T07:26:00.001-07:00

Wow! Heather Graham is really going full force with this comeback. Here she is with some serious nipple action in London for the “Hangover” premiere. What’s this? The 10th one? I hope there are ten more because Heather isn’t the only one who’s hard and erect.

more pictures of Heather Graham here

Heidi Klum Has A New MILF-do

2009-09-17T07:23:00.001-07:00

Just because I’m in a good mood today, here are some more pictures of Victoria’s Secret models at the grand opening of their new Victoria’s Secret Lexington Avenue store. In case you haven’t noticed, Heidi Klum cut her hair. I guess that’s what happens to women as they get older, their hair seems to get shorter. Anyway, she can still rock a tight black dress and that’s good enough for me. And if it’s good enough for me, it’s definitely good enough for you because you’re desperate.

19 more pictures of Heidi Klum, Marisa Miller, Alessandra Ambrosio, Selita Ebanks, and Doutzen Kroes here

Heidi Montag Bikini Pictures

2009-09-17T07:21:00.000-07:00

I don’t know if you guys are watching “I’m a Celebrity, Get me out of Here”, but I’m sure you heard about all the douchery that Heidi Montag and Spencer were involved in. Before the show, I never heard either of them speak and I didn’t realize that Heidi is such a God freak! I’m all for religion, but Heidi seems like the type that has turns to it because she has blown so much man meat in her day to get to where she is, that now she feels the need to spread the gospel or whatever you call it. It. Anyway, here she is enjoying her last days in Costa Rica in a bikini after leaving the show because she was too ill to continue. Poor girl…

Hilary Duff Needs To Use Her Basic Instinct

2009-09-17T07:20:00.001-07:00

Here are shots of Hilary Duff for InStyle Magazine. All I can think about when I see Hilary’s legs crossed in the main photo is… Sharon Stone, Basic Instinct. Unfortunately, there’s no chance Hilary will ever show her lady junk, but here’s to dreaming, sweet Hilary Duff wet dreams. Alright let’s move along, we’re not 15 anymore…

Hilary Swank Bikini Pictures

2009-09-17T07:17:00.000-07:00

What happened to Hilary Swank? Didn’t she used to have a big rack? Well, something’s wrong, because now we’ve got these new candids of Hilary in a bikini, and her boobs are nowhere to be seen. In fact, not only are her boobs gone, but her ass is gone too! It’s as flat as a pancake. Now I’m not sure why I’m posting these photos, since there’s nothing remotely sexy about them, but I guess average-looking chicks need love too.

Holly Madison’s Got Mega Cleavage

2009-09-17T07:15:00.000-07:00

Fresh off her recent wedding to that little old f@#ker, here’s Holly Madison getting back to her old tricks flashing her big fake cleavage at the opening of Rhumbar at The Mirage Hotel and Casino. This is more like it, she’s back, fake hair, fake boobs and a fake smile. Just the way I like my girls, pretending to be interested in me because I’m paying them to. I even like her cute little socks for some strange reason but I especially like the way she sucks down that cocktail. Get it? Cocktail. I’ve got nothing else.

Holly Valance FHM Magazine Pictures

2009-09-16T09:16:00.000-07:00

I don’t really now what to say about these pictures of Australian beauty Holly Valance in the September issue of FHM magazine, it’s pretty obvious that she’s beyond hot, I’m speechless. She’s very intimidating. I think if I saw her in person I’d soil myself. I’m not sure but I don’t think she’d be impressed.

Thanks Pop

Isabel Lucas Gives Megan Fox A Run For Her Money

2009-09-16T09:15:00.000-07:00

Finally, there’s a girl who can stand up to Megan Fox’s hotness at her very own movie Premiere. Here’s Australian actress Isabel Lucas, who also happens to be in the Transformers movie. All I can say, I’m glad to see some new blood on the page and I would like to do everything in my power to keep this mega babe in the limelight. Isabel, call me!

Isla Fisher’s Got Sweet Legs

2009-09-16T09:14:00.000-07:00

I’ve never really paid much attention to Isla Fisher but then again she’s never really starred in a movie or been out promoting it in hot little outfits. Here she is at the ‘Confessions of a Shopaholic‘ UK premiere, showing off her legs. Even though they could use a serious tan, I wouldn’t mind playing Jack and the Beanstalk with them.

Ivanka Trump’s Got Real American Cleavage

2009-09-16T09:13:00.000-07:00

Earlier I posted some pictures of Paris Hilton’s impressive pushed up, taped up skinny girl cleavage but I didn’t think that would satisfy my readers so here’s Ivanka Trump at the 2008 Library Lions benefit in New York City showing us what cleavage should look like. Women with real tits don’t need to resort to tricks like duct tape, super glue or cantilevers to show off their cleavage. Ã‚Â Ã‚Â Lesson learned.

Jaime Pressly’s Bikini Liquor Run

2009-09-16T09:12:00.000-07:00

There are several things that make my life more tolerable, this blog isn’t it one of them, but I think tops on that list are bikinis, booze and fake boobs. Not necessarily in that order. I’m 90% sure that Jaime Pressly’s got fake boobs and here she is with them stuffed into a little bikini making a run for some booze at the liquor store. That’s close enough to a hollywoodtuna hat trick if you ask me.

Jenna Jameson Gets Her Groove On

2009-09-16T09:10:00.000-07:00

Here’s Jenna Jameson doing her little dance thing at her boyfriend Tito Ortiz’s birthday. Now I know there has been concern about her weight as of late but I’m not one to criticize someone for being too skinny. That goes against every moral fiber in my body. All jokes aside though, she is getting a little too thin. Even for Tuna standards. So let’s hope there’s a major turn of events soon and Jenna re-appears full figured.

Jennifer Aniston’s Got Sweet Legs

2009-09-16T09:09:00.000-07:00

Normally Jennifer Aniston bores the stuffing out of me but lately she seems to be turning it up a bit. First, she poses nude for GQ Magazine and now she shows up at the ‘Marley and Me’ premiere looking like an actual movie star. Unfortunately she’s still a terrible actress and this movie is sure to tank but for now we can all enjoy her long legs and tight body because I’m pretty sure they don’t have premieres for straight to DVD movies anymore.

39 more pictures of Jennifer Aniston here

Jennifer Ellison Brings Us Boobs And Beer

2009-09-16T09:07:00.002-07:00

Jennifer Ellison has always been one of my favorites, she’s cute and she’s got delicious big tits, so when I found pictures of her launching the British Beer & Pub Association’s campaign against recent increases in the price of a pint… I fell in love. I’m behind her 100%, whoever thought of getting a hottie like Jennifer to help the campaign is a genius. Beer and boobs should be free for everyone, someone should write a letter to Obama.

more pictures of Jennifer Ellison here

Jennifer Garner’s Raggedy Ass Is A Filler

2009-09-16T09:07:00.001-07:00

Here’s Jennifer Garner learning to paddle surf in Hawaii. I’ve never heard of, or seen anyone paddle surf before, so this is a first for me! To be honest it doesn’t look very exciting. You know what else doesn’t look very exciting? Jenn’s ass. Ya, I know, she’s a mother and I should cut her some slack but I was forced to do this crappy post because there’s no good material today.. I guess Jen’s raggedy old ass is still better than a kick in the nuts though, right?

Jennifer Lopez’s Got Boobs

2009-09-16T09:05:00.000-07:00

Jenny from the Block finally got some boobs. Her twins must be well fed on those and it even looks like she could spare a few extra quarts for Marc. Anyway, here she is at ‘The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button’ premiere and for once I’m not hating her. Usually, seeing the girl’s face puts my turtle back in its shell but being a breasts man, this time I am defenceless.

31 more pictures of Jennifer Lopez here

Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Cleavage Is Yummy

2009-09-16T09:04:00.000-07:00

Being single is doing Jennifer Love Hewitt’s body some good and I have a feeling her boobs will be the talk of tinsel town once again. That is, as long as she stays single, because we all know what happens if she isn’t. So memo to all men, now even though Jen’s present day yumminess may be enticing stay away from her. It’s for the best and yes you’re welcome Jen!

Jessica Alba Bikini Pictures

2009-09-16T09:02:00.000-07:00

Here’s the moment you’ve all been waiting for; Jessica Alba post pregnancy bikini pictures. It took a year or two, but they’re finally here and guess what?! They’re amazing! I mean, you couldn’t tell by looking at her that a baby popped out of her not too long ago. She should be a role model to all expecting mothers out there, there’s no excuse to let your body go down after giving birth! Jessica is proof.

Jessica Simpson’s Breasts (We Salute You)

2009-09-16T09:00:00.000-07:00

This post is for all you Jessica Simpson haters, Oh you know who you are. Try to hate these tits! I bet you can’t. Here she is heading out for dinner in NYC and proving to the world that she is hands down the Queen Of Cleavage! Bow down to the Mammaries.

Jewel’s Jewels Have Lost Their Shine

2009-09-16T08:59:00.000-07:00

The former “Reigning Queen Of Cleavage” Jewel was at the People’s Choice Awards last night. I don’t know why, since she hasn’t done anything of significance in the last 10 years, so I guess she was just there to show off her deflated cleavage. You know, when I see a hottie like Jewel who used to have awesome big breasts lose them to Mother Nature like this, it’s a travesty. I think we should all remember this day as day of remembrance. The day Jewel lost her jewels forever.

Joanna Krupa’s Sexy Lingerie Pictures

2009-09-16T08:58:00.000-07:00

Here’s Joanna Krupa modelling Bon Prix Lingerie. I believe it’s some budget lingerie company because “bon prix” means good price… Yes, the few years I took French in school did paid off. Anyway, all I know is if anyone was going to pawn cheap shit (and by cheap there’s even fabric missing in the crotch area) and make it look good, there’s nobody who can pull it off better than Joanna.

Jodie Marsh: Welcome To The Gun Show

2009-09-16T08:57:00.002-07:00

The last time we saw Jodie Marsh she was pretend lezz’ing it up with some hardcore butch Dykes. Here she is at a special appearance at the ‘Palace Night Club ‘and that act seems to be gone because she’s holding hands with some dude… or is it?! It’s hard to know for sure when you’re dealing with Jodie Marsh. I’m glad she’s back to her old classy self and I hope to get more great shots of her gun show.

more pictures of Jodie Marsh here

Jordana Brewster’s Sexy Maxim Magazine Pictures

2009-09-16T08:57:00.001-07:00

I don’t think in the 4 years that I have been doing this site, I have ever done a post on Jordana Brewster. Which comes as a surprise because she is so damn hot. Well, here’s a Hollywood Tuna first: Jordana Brewster in Maxim Magazine. I believe she is promoting The Fast & The Furious, but she didn’t need a big movie like that to get on my site. She could’ve easily sent me some scantily clad pictures of herself straight to my email, it would’ve been a whole lot easier for the both of us.

Josie Maran Bikini Pictures

2009-09-16T08:53:00.000-07:00

If my memory serves me correctly, these Josie Maran bikini pictures were for an issue of Shape Magazine that came out a while ago. The reason I’m posting them though is because now we’ve got the whole set, not just the ones they published in the mag. Also, recently we’ve seen Josie looking like a hot mess at several events, so these bikini pictures are a reminder of just how hot she really is when all done up. Or in this case, done down, depending how you want to look at it. Anyway, no matter the situation, it’s downright scary how this girl can never look bad.

Joss Stone Upskirt Pictures

2009-09-16T08:52:00.000-07:00

Here’s Joss Stone trying to be the best little wannabe hippie she can be while performing at the Coachella Music Festival. The only thing she forgot about being a hippie is, sure she lost the shoes, but she forgot to lose the panties. I do suspect there is a bush hidden under there, but I sure don’t want to find out. Any chick who doesn’t wear shoes is filthy in my books. What do they do when they go to the ladies room?

Kaley Cuoco’s Face Looks A Little Banged Up

2009-09-16T08:50:00.000-07:00

Here’s Kaley Cuoco from the ‘Big Bang Theory’ at The Alzheimer’s Association’s 17th Annual “A Night At Sardi’s” event. Speaking of Big Bangs, what’s with all her funny faces but her expressions? She looks like one of those chicks during the happy ending of a porn flick. Surprisingly this is the first time I’ve done a post on her, too bad it wasn’t a bang! OW!

more pictures of Kaley Cuoco here

Kate Beckinsale Bikini Pictures

2009-09-16T08:49:00.000-07:00

Here’s Kate Beckinsale once again in a bikini snorkeling. I have to say that Kate is giving Elizabeth Hurley a run for her money for the Hottest MILF Award. It’s a very close competition, so close that I can’t decide. However, if Kate really wants the title all she needs to do is blow my snorkel. It’s as simple as that.

12 more pictures of Kate Beckinsale in a bikini here

Kate Bosworth Bikini Pictures

2009-09-16T08:48:00.001-07:00

Here’s Kate Bosworth at the beach in Malibu. Now I know these bikini pictures are lacking a little something extra. You know that little something that makes bikini pictures exciting. Unfortunately, I can’t put my finger on tits, I mean it.

12 more pictures of Kate Bosworth in a bikini here

Kate Hudson’s Boobless Hotness

2009-09-16T08:46:00.000-07:00

For a chick with absolutely no boobs Kate Hudson actually looks pretty damn good at the Cartier 100th Anniversary in America Celebration. I shouldn’t say stuff like that because I really don’t discriminate against women who have small tits, I don’t see size, I just see yet another woman who won’t have anything to do with me. So sad, show me your nipples please.